Interplanetary radio signals from future Martian potatoes
Interplanetary radio signal broadcast from Mars around 0002466 CE to the small number of residual Earth humans (who did not make it to Mars or chose not to). The audio signal consists of varying sine wave frequencies from a more-than-human source. It contains a recording of bioelectric data translated into sonified readings of microcurrent fluctuations in plant or para-plant beings.
Interplanetary radio signals from future Martian potatoes
As the pampered pets of Martian potatoes families, humans were bred for a life of comfortable dependence, to graze on specially prepared foods and sleep on soft beds. Human females were only able to conceive in matings sanctioned by their potato owners. This kept their population numbers low, which was good as many potatoes became quickly bored by their human pets.
Interplanetary radio signals from future Martian potatoes
Using spectral analysis and methods of demodulation the Interplanetary radio signal has been decoded into an image. The compression and limited bandwidth needed to send the signal over the long spatial temporal distance from future Mars to Earth means that the image is grainy. However, it appears to be an iteration of an original photographic item in Getty Museum’s collection. The broadcaster is likely to be a Martian intelligence of potato-human descent, as the photograph of earthly Solanaceae, may have been sent as a visual signifier for the audio’s contextualization.
Interplanetary radio signals from future Martian potatoes
Reduced to the level of slime footed molluscs during the Golden Age of potato dominance on Earth, humans eventually recovered sentience through the secreted wisdoms sucked from ancient ruined cities. Even when not understood, this knowledge could be shared and widely copied, which unfortunately resulted in repeated acts of catastrophic mass extinctions. Humans would seemingly go to any lengths to regain their own fictitious Golden Age.
Interplanetary radio signals from future Martian potatoes
450 solar years of after the first potato-human colonies were established on Mars, the exiled diaspora of Solanum Sapiens and Homo Tuberosum are now ready to return home to Earth. As an offering they bring with them descendants of original Martian soil, sourced by the Pampas de La Joya by CIP (The International Potato Centre) and NASA in 0002016 CE, long since extinct on Earth.
Interplanetary radio signals from future Martian potatoes
It took centuries to generate a liveable Mars. Semi sentient machines were sent ahead with genetic material on board to create colonists adapted to the newly terraformed planet. A fortunate mix-up with automated gene grafting resulted in the creation of a potato-human hybrid species that vastly exceeded the qualities of their parents. Their lives on Mars were not utopian, but allowed for greater choice about how to spend time, as the machines did the majority of work.
Interplanetary radio signals from future Martian potatoes
In a much diminished form, humans managed to sustain a rudimentary civilization by scavenging corpses from mass graves. They continued to feed on putrid meat and were employed for a while as filtering devices for blite and the toxic waste of Potato cities. Their dependency on potato waste products limited their reprodcutive potential, and they eventually became extinct after suffering epoch long bouts of debilitating indegestion.
084.XP.000724.44
Solanaceae
0001920 CE
Ancient archival image of what is believed to be the original photographic item in Getty Museum’s collection. The image captures an intimate moment in the emerging coming into being of an unnamed tuber’s renaissance, following the seasonal dormancies that for Martian potato colonists can last for many solar years. Its naked candour was shocking at the time.
Informed by Koseman, C.M. 2025. All Tomorrows the Myriad Species and Mixed Fortunes of Man. Wilton Square Books London.